


Queer Eye for the Solo Guy

by commandercrouton



Series: Reylo Drabbles & One-Shots [3]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: 404 Kylo Ren not found, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, I needed something silly to get over my sad one shot, Poe and Finn have terrible ideas, Queer Eye for the Straight Guy Inspired, Reylo - Freeform, Soft boy Ben, but they mean well, guys this is pure crack, minor stormpilot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-11
Updated: 2019-04-11
Packaged: 2020-01-11 06:54:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18425190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/commandercrouton/pseuds/commandercrouton
Summary: Poe and Finn held back tears as they finished binge-watching the newest season of Queer Eye on Netflix.“God, these guys are just so amazing,” Poe sniffled.“They just make me want to believe in the positivity in the world,” Finn agreed.“I just wish we could help someone like that. We could totally do it.”“Oh my god, you would totally be Tan and Jonathan,” Finn nodded in excitement.“You could be Antoni. But the rest of them is all me,” Poe flattered himself.“Don’t be an ass, Poe.”“But that’s what you love about me,” Poe pretended to be shocked. He smiled as he drew Finn in for a quick kiss.“But if we do this, who could we makeover?”“Finn, you’re serious? You think we could actually do this? Which one of our dumbass friends would go along with this — Oh, I have the best idea,” Poe grinned devilishly.





	Queer Eye for the Solo Guy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RebelRebel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RebelRebel/gifts).



> This is just pure crack. I watched the new season and needed something silly to get over my last one-shot Branded (a total angst fest). This is for you Lindsay! You help motivate me, you fangirl with me, and you let me talk your ear off about this season. You are the best!

Poe and Finn held back tears as they finished binge-watching the newest season of  _ Queer Eye _ on Netflix. 

 

“God, these guys are just so amazing,” Poe sniffled.

 

“They just make me want to believe in the positivity in the world,” Finn agreed.

 

“I just wish we could help someone like that. We could totally do it.”

 

“Oh my god, you would totally be Tan and Jonathan,” Finn nodded in excitement.

 

“You could be Antoni. But the rest of them is all me,” Poe flattered himself.

 

“Don’t be an ass, Poe.”

 

“But that’s what you love about me,” Poe pretended to be shocked. He smiled as he drew Finn in for a quick kiss.

 

“But if we do this, who could we makeover?”

 

“Finn, you’re serious? You think we could actually do this? Which one of our dumbass friends would go along with this — Oh, I have the best idea,” Poe grinned devilishly.

 

\-----

 

Ben stood outside Finn and Poe’s house, standing around nervously as he waited for them to open the door.

 

“Ben, you made it!” Poe smiled, ushering Ben inside. “Finn, Ben’s here!”

 

“Where’s Rey? You said she needed my help,” Ben asked, confused and glancing around.

 

“Oh yeah, she canceled,” Finn lied easily.

 

“Oh,” Ben mumbled, looking vaguely disappointed.

 

Finn and Poe shared a look, fighting matching grins. This was almost  _ too  _ easy.

 

“Are those  _ Crocs _ ?” Poe was aghast, looking down at the shoes on Ben’s feet.

 

Ben looked down and frowned. “Yeah, they’re comfy. Did she get everything handled? Maybe I should call her,” Ben responded, pulling out his phone from his, ahem, khaki pants that were  _ three _ sizes too big.

 

“It’s fine. She just needed help for a date. I helped her pick an outfit,” Poe smiled.

 

“What do you mean date?” Ben froze and his already pale face seemed to grow paler.

 

“Oh, just some rando she met at the coffee shop, no big.” Finn led Ben into their home.

 

“Is he...cute?” Ben mumbled.

 

“Wanna see a pic?” Poe grinned, pulling out his phone.

 

Finn stared at him in horror. Nope, they were gonna be busted.

 

“He looks like he could be a model,” Ben whispered to himself. “No wonder she would never go for me.”

 

_ Bingo. _

 

“Now Ben, you are sweet and handsome. What makes you say that?” Poe wondered aloud, trying his best to hide his eager face. Luck was on his side that Ben had no idea Poe just looked up a generic male model to show him.

 

“I don’t look like that. I’m just so...big and awkward.”

 

“We can help you if you want. If you aren’t comfortable in your own skin. We know all about that,” Finn offered.

 

“I don’t know,” Ben trailed off thoughtfully.

 

“Trust us. You have so much to offer. Not only can this help your love life, but also your confidence level. You walk around like you aren’t some 6’3 mountain man. I’ve seen you shirtless Ben. You’ve just got to dress to accessorize your frame correctly. Besides, I’m pretty sure Rey was checking you out when we went swimming out by the lake a couple of months ago,” Finn smiled innocently at him.

 

Ben blushed. “Okay, if you think so.”

 

Finn and Poe high-fived before dragging Ben out of their house.

 

“First stop, your closet. No one wears those fedoras anymore. They do nothing for you either,” Poe told him as they all slid into Ben’s Camry.

 

\---

 

“Now, why don’t you explain your outfit choice,” Poe prompted as Finn went through his closet and pulled out all the outdated button-down shirts.

 

Ben looked down at the dark brown button-down covered by the mustard-colored sweater, paired with his favorite khakis and new crocs. “What’s wrong with my outfit?”

 

Finn coughed into his hand to prevent himself from laughing.

 

“Ben, how do I put this delicately? You look like an 80-year-old retiree who moved to Florida. That hat does nothing for you,” Poe bluntly answered.

 

Ben took off his hat and clutched it tightly in his hands. “The hat covers my ears. And I thought I look nice. My grandpa used to dress like this,” Ben tried to defend himself. Did he really look that stupid? Is that why Rey never looked his way?

 

“Ben, you have such great hair, and I honestly think we could help cover your ears if you absolutely want to. But the outfit was cool forty years ago. It’s time to update,” Finn said as he glanced at the clothes he tossed on the bed. All he saw were ratty t-shirts from high school that were too small, and button-downs that swallowed his figure. 

 

“Poe, why don’t you start looking for clothes that would fit Ben’s frame. Ben, you and I can stay here and talk about your decor. It doesn’t scream committed man looking to settle down.” Finn looked around the sparse apartment.

 

“Well, what does it matter? I only sleep and eat here. I’m either at work or with you guys,” Ben told him. 

 

Poe sat on the couch in the living room scrolling Pinterest for outfit ideas.

 

“That’s just it, Ben. This is your home. Your safe space. It should be a reflection of you and what matters to you. There’s no color. It’s empty. It’s cold. This home should feel welcoming,” Finn explained.

 

“I guess it does feel a bit empty,” Ben acknowledged, glancing around and seeing his apartment in a new light. 

 

The furniture was limited, and no personal possessions were displayed. If he walked into this random apartment, he would think it was a model home. It was as if the apartment belonged to a ghost. 

 

“So, if you could change anything about this space, what would you do?” Finn asked, doing his best to channel Bobby from the Fab Five.

 

Ben glanced around. “I would want it to be like Rey’s apartment,” he answered truthfully.

 

“And why Rey’s? The color? The plants?”

 

“I just walk in her apartment and it seems like home,” Ben answered, unsure how to explain it.

 

Finn nodded as if he understood. Oh, this boy had it bad. “Why don’t we go to Target and Lowe’s and see what we can do. I’m thinking of painting the walls to a much lighter color. It will help bring more light into the apartment. More shelves for your books, and frames for your photos. You like taking photos right? Which ones are your favorite?”

 

Ben instantly brightened as they delved into safer territory. He eagerly grabbed his laptop and powered it on. “These are my favorites,” he proudly stated.

 

On the screen were black and white photos of their small family at the last picnic at Ben’s family’s lake house. There were photos of Finn and Poe hugging one another, caught in a tender moment. His parents were featured in a couple of photos as well, arguing and making up. 

 

Those photos were a fraction of the photos he had of Rey. Candid moments of her laughing with Finn and Poe on either side, working on the boat with Han when it stalled out, sunning herself on the dock, a few teasing as she looked straight into the camera, catching Ben in the act of taking pictures of her. 

 

“These are beautiful, Ben. I think we should definitely highlight your art in your home,” Finn expressed, clicking through the album.

 

“Oh, it’s not art. I’m just fiddling around,” Ben mumbled. He was obviously uncomfortable with his photos being called art.

 

“Don’t underestimate your talent. You are great at this!” Finn reassured him. “You know what, I even think I remember Rey telling me she loved your photos. She really wanted some in her apartment. Would you mind?”

 

Ben’s face turned red at the prospect of his photos being in Rey’s home. He stuttered out a confirmation, turning to his laptop to make a folder of photos just for Rey. 

 

Finn watched for a moment before making his way to Poe. “Any luck sweetheart?”

 

“All I know is the French tuck,” Poe groaned, “but if Tan can do it, so can I. I was thinking something like this? And we should definitely burn all the Crocs and hats we can get our hands on.”

 

The couple looked back at Ben with the collar of his button-down peeking out of his cardigan. 

 

“Agreed,” Finn said.

 

“Hey Ben, it’s time to say goodbye to your clothes and those Crocs. We are donating them,” Poe called out behind him.

 

Ben was too engrossed in his project to acknowledge what Poe said.

 

\----

 

Poe was running his fingers over the clothes in the store. He never realized just how  _ massive  _ Ben was. He had no idea how badly the shirt swallowed his frame until he put him in something more fitted.

 

“These are too small,” Ben fidgeted as he tried on some plaid flannel shirts.

 

“Oh no Ben, those are just perfect. You look like a snack!” Poe squealed.

 

“I feel like I’m gonna rip the seams,” he flexed his shoulders. 

 

All of a sudden, Poe’s throat was very dry. Finn was definitely missing out.

 

“You know, I think Rey loves plaid stuff. She thinks it gives men this rugged look,” Poe told him, trying to look nonchalant.

 

Ben pursed his lips, pausing, trying to form the words correctly. “Well, I guess this doesn’t look too bad.”

 

Poe smiled gleefully. “That fit looks so good on you. Now it’s time you stand up straight. Tan always says to exude confidence when you walk. You have such an amazing presence and are just so handsome. Own it, Ben!” Poe walked up behind him, using his hands to straighten Ben’s spine.

 

Ben looked at his reflection in wonder. It did look like he was a different person when he stood tall. 

 

“Now, let’s try on some jeans. Always need a few dark pairs of jeans. With t-shirts, you have your nice day-to-day wear, but with this button down, it can easily be upgraded to date wear,” Poe explained, holding up the pair of dark wash jeans between his two shirts.

 

“Date wear,” Ben squeaked.

 

“Well yeah, you won’t be single forever! And even if it isn’t for dates, it can be for nights out with friends. You can wear this next time we do bar trivia! Now try on this red button-down. It would look so good with this Snow White thing you got going on,” Poe told him, thrusting the shirt in his hands.

 

“Snow White thing?”

 

“Hair as black as night. Skin as white as snow. Kissable lips as red as blood,” Poe grinned at him.

 

“My lips aren’t kissable,” Ben argued, clenching the shirt in his hands.

 

“Oh really? Maybe I heard Rey wrong then when she made the comparison,” Poe pondered.

 

Poe was pleased to hear a slam as the fitting room door closed in his face. Rey really had no idea of the power she had over this guy. This was a power he could use to his advantage, but he could not betray the Fab Five like this. 

 

“Give me strength, Tan. We are about to do your signature move,” Poe prayed. 

 

Ben stepped out looking like a delectable poison apple Poe definitely wanted to take a bite out of.

 

“Damn Ben, slay queen!” Poe jumped up and down.

 

“I don’t know what that means.” Ben stared blankly. “Do I look okay?’

 

“You look fabulous. Look in the mirror. Slip on the dark brown loafers. Now, this is important. Since you are so tall, some shirts may not be tuckable in your jeans. If that happens, and you wanna make it look a bit fancier, you can do something called the ‘french tuck.’ Just grab the front and tuck it into your belt and voila!”

 

Ben looked at himself in the mirror, shocked at what he saw. “I look...good. I didn’t know I could look this good.”

 

Poe just smiled, thanking the Fab Five for their infinite wisdom.

 

\---

 

“How do you have nothing in your fridge?” Finn asked, rummaging through his fridge, pantry, and cabinets.

 

Ben just shrugged. “I mainly eat with you guys, or Rey, or take out.”

 

“Can you even cook?”

 

“Of course I can cook. Nana Padme taught me,” he said.

 

“So why don’t you?”

 

Ben chewed on his bottom lip. “Ever since Nana died, it just feels...wrong. It doesn’t feel right to continue doing something we used to do together.”

 

“Oh Ben, Nana did those things with you because she loves you. She wouldn’t have wanted you to stop because she was gone. She shared her recipes with you because she wanted those special memories. If she was anything like my grandma, she would want you to share those recipes with your loved ones,” Finn gently told him.

 

He was shocked to see Ben’s jaw tense and his eyes glisten with unshed tears. Ben flung himself into Finn’s arms, hugging him tightly. 

 

“Thanks, Finn,” he whispered. He pulled away hastily, wiping at his eyes.

 

Finn just squeezed his shoulder. He knew that Karamo and Antoni would be proud of him.

 

\---

 

Poe sat in the hairdresser chair next to Ben’s, rotating as he watched the hairdresser run his fingers through Ben’s hair.

 

“Thanks for not shaving,” Cassian, the barber, told him.

 

“Uh, you’re welcome?” Ben responded, looking helplessly at Poe.

 

“Don’t look at him, look at me. Tell me, Ben, what do you do to your hair every day?”

 

“Eh, I wash it. Then I just wear hats all the time,” he answered, staring at Cassian in the mirror.

 

“No no no. Ben, we do not wash our hair every day. Every two to three days or as needed. It rids the scalp of much-needed oils. What about conditioner? This mane is luscious,” Cassian said.

 

“No conditioner.”

 

“That must change. Your hair is so full of life, but it can’t bounce because of the hats you wear. Why do you wear them?”

 

“My ears,” Ben mumbled, a blush forming on his cheeks. 

 

Cassian grinned as he saw the tips of his ears turn red. “Ah yes, the ears. Some ladies may find this trait endearing, yes? If you style it appropriately though, we can hide your ears if you want us to, and your gorgeous hair won’t be hidden under those ugly hats ever again.”

 

“They weren’t that bad,” Ben defended.

 

Cassian and Poe laughed in tandem. Ben just glowered at the two.

 

Cassian washed and conditioned his hair, trimming it to just below his neckline. He grabbed some pomade that also included beeswax and ran the substance through Ben’s hair.

 

“This is a special kind of wax that has a great hold, but can also be restyled once the beeswax in the pomade heats up. So if your hair ever seems to fall flat through the days you don’t wash your hair, just grab a blow dryer and restyle it. Your hair already has so much volume, so you don’t need to do much. Just a quick run through, and air dry,” Cassian lectured over the sound of the blow dryer.

 

Ben sat dutifully, quietly as he watched the hairdresser work magic on his hair. He had no idea his hair could look like this. Cassian was right. He didn’t need to wear a hat all the time to hide his ears. If his hair was styled correctly, it would do it for him.

 

“Now your facial hair is a bit patchy. I see we have a kind of soul patch thing going on, what do you think Poe?” Cassian asked.

 

“Don’t you care what I think?” Ben interjected.

 

“Not after that business with the hat,” Cassian disagreed.

 

Poe bit back a laugh. “I think you are onto something there, Cassian.”

 

“Ben, I also am noticing a ton of moles on your face. What do you do for skin care?” Cassian wondered as he started to trim and style Ben’s face.

 

“Um, nothing?”

 

“Oh, Ben,” Cassian tsked. “Facial lotion with sunscreen is heaven sent. My wife and I swear by it. It protects your skin from harmful rays, keeps your skin young, and honestly if another mole popped up, I don’t think you’d notice.”

 

“Don’t worry, Ben. I’ll tell Finn to pick some up on the way back from his last-minute shopping run,” Poe interrupted.

 

Ben breathed a sigh of relief, and Poe smiled. Cassian delivered the lines just as good as Jonathan did.

 

\----

 

“Poe, what do you need me at Ben’s for?” Rey muttered, fidgeting as they rode up the elevator.

 

“I told you, he’s gonna cook us dinner,” Poe reminded her. He glanced at the blue sundress she wore.

 

“I think he’s mad at me. He hasn’t responded to any of my texts the past couple of days,” she bit her lip, clenching the skirt of her dress in her hands.

 

“That may be our fault. Finn and I kinda told him you had a date on Saturday,” Poe admitted sheepishly.

 

“You did what,” she gritted out. “You know I like him!”

 

“Look, Karamo says that we have to take a chance when we see it. Finn and I saw the chance, and we did what he suggested.” Poe raised his hands defensively.

 

“Karamo?” Rey blinked confusedly. 

 

Poe briefly thought her eyeliner must have been a good brand because it didn’t smudge at all.

 

“Oh my god, did you try to Fab Five Ben?” Rey screeched just as the elevator doors opened.

 

“Oh honey, wait until you see him. He is to die for. I almost want to take a bite out of him.” He raised his eyebrows lasciviously. 

 

“Back off, Poe. He’s mine. Besides, there was nothing wrong with Ben. Yeah, he dressed a bit...different. But he’s sweet and kind. That’s what matters,” Rey defended him.

 

“Of course he is! We just updated his wardrobe is all. He is still the same sweet guy we all know and love,” Poe told her.

 

The Fab Five would be so proud of him.

 

“Stop preening. You look like a damn fool,” Rey snapped before letting herself into Ben’s apartment.

 

“No, Rey, don’t — you’re supposed to knock first!” Poe huffed.

 

“Rey! What are you doing here?” Finn asked, closing the door to the bedroom in a hurry.

 

She was too busy glancing at the apartment in wonder. “What the hell did you guys do?” she breathed.

 

“Well, Ben’s place never felt like home, so we asked him what he liked. He said he liked how comfortable your place felt, so we tried to capture that,” Finn explained.

 

Rey glanced around at the shades of light grays painted on the walls. Framed photos of their group and his family graced them, too — she was pleased to see her face was in the majority of them. 

 

Ben now had bookshelves to hold his many books he usually just shoved anywhere against the walls, and a coffee table now sat in front of the couch. Rey smiled, thinking it would make eating take out during movie nights that much easier.

 

“Finn, this place looks really good. What does Ben think?” she wondered.

 

“I really like it,” his voice called out from behind her.

 

Rey turned around and froze, taking in Ben’s new appearance.

 

“Ben?” she whispered. Was she breathing? It felt like the world was pressing on her chest.

 

Ben watched her as she took in his new appearance. He thought it was his new self-assurance, but it seemed like Rey was blushing at his new attire. Well, he wouldn’t know unless he asked.

 

“What do you think?” he asked, striding forward with an air of confidence Rey had no idea he possessed.

 

“You look...fucking gorgeous,” she said honestly. A moment later, her eyes widened as what she said just hit her. 

 

Ben smirked sheepishly at her, biting his bottom lip as he tried not to smile at her compliment.

 

Rey wanted to bite it.

 

She always thought he was handsome. But this...this was something else. He just looked so confident and comfortable in his skin for once. He wasn’t even wearing those stupid hats so she could admire how soft his hair looked. She openly checked him out, smile widening as she took in his footwear.

 

“I hoped you were joking about buying Crocs,” she smiled.

 

“Oh actually —,” Ben began before Poe cut him off.

 

“Just a joke,” Poe laughed, silencing Ben with a look.

 

“Something smells really good,” Rey continued, still looking at Ben.

 

“I made baked penne,” he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s my Nana’s recipe. I thought you might want to try it.”

 

“I’d love to,” she smiled even wider.

 

Finn and Poe looked at one another, realizing the two idiots standing in the room with them wouldn’t even notice if they left. They subtly fist bumped as they made their way out of the apartment, leaving Rey and Ben to have their unofficial first date.

 

“The Fab Five would be so proud of us,” Finn cheered as they stepped in the elevator.

 

“The Fab Five has got nothing on us. We are the Dynamic Duo,” Poe responded smugly, clasping his boyfriend’s hand.

 

“You know what this means right?” Finn asked.

 

“Yep! I call dibs on naming their firstborn,” Poe claimed.

 

Finn rolled his eyes. 

 

Dynamic Duo, indeed.

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi @[CommanderCrouton](https://commandercrouton.tumblr.com/)!


End file.
